Alec Baldwin Opens Up on Suicidal Thoughts After Rust Tragedy

Alec Baldwin has publicly shared the profound psychological impact of the tragic shooting incident on the set of the film Rust, revealing that he experienced suicidal thoughts following the event. The shooting, which occurred in October 2021, resulted in the death of cinematographer Halyna Hutchins and injured director Joel Souza. Baldwin’s emotional turmoil has persisted over the years, exacerbated by ongoing legal challenges and intense public scrutiny.

During an appearance on the podcast Dopey: On the Dark Comedy of Drug Addiction in December 2025, Baldwin expressed that the ordeal had “broken every nerve” in his body. He described a state of “surreal” grief, revealing that he often questioned whether he wanted to continue living. “When you get to that point where you go, ‘I don’t want to wake up another day,’ I’m gonna go,” he stated, articulating the depths of his despair.

The actor, now 67 years old, conveyed how the aftermath of the shooting has affected his daily life and relationships. He indicated that the emotional strain has taken a significant toll, estimating that it has “taken at least 10 years” off his lifespan. Baldwin recounted moments where he found it difficult to perform even basic tasks, such as getting out of bed to be with his children. “There were times I’d lay in bed. I’d go, ‘Wow, my kids. I can’t get up,'” he shared, highlighting a stark contrast to his previous self.

Baldwin’s wife, Hilaria Baldwin, has been a crucial supporter during this challenging period. She disclosed on their reality series, The Baldwins, that Baldwin was diagnosed with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) as a result of the incident. Hilaria characterized her husband as a “shadow of his former self,” burdened by survivor’s guilt. “He says in his darkest moments, ‘If an accident had to have happened this day, why am I still here?'” she revealed, emphasizing the profound trauma affecting their family.

The situation for Baldwin remains complex. In late December 2025, he faced a new lawsuit from Seth Kenney, the owner of the ammunition supply company involved in the incident. Kenney’s claims that Baldwin and others made him a “scapegoat” for the tragedy have added further legal and financial pressure to Baldwin’s already strained circumstances.

Despite these ongoing challenges, Baldwin has remained focused on his family’s well-being. “I always feel more in pain about you than me,” he told Hilaria in a filmed confessional, expressing concern for the emotional toll the situation has taken on her and their seven children.

As Baldwin navigates this “very painful” chapter of his life, his candid disclosures serve as a poignant reminder of the often-overlooked human consequences of accidents that blur the line between fiction and reality. The actor’s journey underscores the importance of addressing mental health issues, particularly in the wake of trauma, and highlights the enduring effects that such incidents can have on individuals and their families.